Richard Osman

Richard Osman


You know, that guy from that thing. All enquiries to lucyp@zeppotron.com

1065126 followers  •  1518 follow  •    •  

Since I was a kid it was always my dream to have my very own American pool table, and, 40 years later, here we are. I would weep tears of joy if I wasn't worried about affecting the cloth.

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For pool lovers, this a Singapore table from the amazing @libertygames  . They have been so brilliant. This is not an ad, I'm just very happy 🎱

In #TheManWhoDiedTwice  one of the Thursday Murder Club joins Instagram, and so I set the account up in real life too. It's fun to watch the follower count creep up as a few people read proof copies of the book and discover it!

Wotsits, Skips, Frazzles and Monster Munch were all invented within 6 years of each other in the 1970s. The golden age of maize snacks.

If you think Covid is a hoax, then there is a huge business opportunity for you. Set up an insurance company for the film & TV industry, indemnify against Covid cases at very low premiums. If you are right you will never have to pay out and you'll make a fortune. #GoForIt 

Ok, I am bored on a train, sure, but I am deadly serious about this. I want to create a rival to Celebrations/Quality Street/Roses etc. There's a gap in the market, I'm certain of it. And it would include compulsory relegation for under-performing chocolates.

Very proud that #TheThursdayMurderClub  has just racked up its 38th week at number 1. In a world where people tweet hate or meanness for money and attention, I'm very grateful that people still love books, and that warmth and joy still makes money too. #BuyBooks 

Really enjoying #TheHundred . This is going to do great business for the BBC, and great long-term business for cricket. Formatable live sport is so vital for terrestrial TV, and vice-versa.

If you don't have any actual talent which gets people's attention then you have to get attention in other ways.

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I try not to tweet political opinions, but as it’s my birthday allow me just one. The Tories do want to sell off the NHS. Not in one go, just bit by bit until it’s unrecognisable. You’ll turn up one day and there will be a priority waiting room. They’ve always been open about it.

We're being taken for absolute mugs. Our parents, our kids, our carers, our health workers, every one of us. It's such a sad day.

If you can't do your job without bullying people then you can't do your job.

People still congregating in busy spaces saying ‘it’s the Dunkirk sprit’, need to understand that in this scenario they’re actually being the Luftwaffe.

Refusing to believe anything you're told, doesn't make you cleverer than the rest of us. Recognising the times when you are actually being told the truth is a crucial skill.

I don’t think we can ever really say this enough, but if you’re an NHS worker just coming off shift, or about to go on shift, you have the gratitude of an entire nation. Sending you love and strength and thanks beyond words. None of this will be forgotten.

This government U turn was originally a B turn.

After four months of not being able to go to the pub, it's been so lovely, finally, to not go to the pub out of choice.

Stop engaging with idiots online. Your response is the only oxygen they have.

Look, most people are going to wear masks, just like most people were kind and careful throughout lockdown. So stop engaging with the 'no facemasks' gang. They don't mean it, they're showing off to their mates. Give your attention to quiet, empathetic, secure people.

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