1. News >
  2. Patton Oswalt >
4,459,545 followers   •   3,145 following   •   Los Angeles   •   http://www.pattonoswalt.c
Mr. Oswalt is a former wedding deejay from Northern Virginia.

Latest Scoops

Got my Halloween costume locked: Jack Lemmon in SAVE THE TIGER.
😂😂😂😂😂😂
“Much much more than a musical!” — Oliver.

Oh dear God WHAT
🎶I love tartar sauce/With the deep-fried fishies/But later in my tummy I have
Saucy hip action between takes on @CW_CrazyXGF. Tune in Friday! #slay
Video player
Also, come see me on my Amazing Abs Posing Tour.
“Gregor Mendel, motherfucker! MENDEL!” — guest on Maury Povich to her boyfriend after DNA test proves he is the father of her baby
I'm returning to @CW_CrazyXGF this Friday!!! Enjoy this cryptic pic. Also, someone please turn it into a poster for an 80's-style slasher flick. Thank you!
Sleep, you fickle bastard, let’s try this again.
Total(1) => 0.091443061828613 f_f_QM(2) => 0.083188056945801 indS(2) => 0.060441970825195 indM(2) => 0.019645929336548 indM_1(2) => 0.0039272308349609 indM_2(2) => 0.0010879039764404 indM_4(2) => 0.0034799575805664 indM_5(2) => 0.0036990642547607 indM_6(2) => 0.0019698143005371 indM_7(2) => 0.0038859844207764 indM_8(2) => 0.0010969638824463 f_f_pTL(2) => 0.00534987449646 f_f_dT(19) => 0.0050663948059082