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4,420,033 followers   •   3,074 following   •   Los Angeles   •   http://www.pattonoswalt.c
Mr. Oswalt is a former wedding deejay from Northern Virginia.

Latest Scoops

The Eagles now have the top-selling album in US history.

Reading the Trivia section of Burgess Meredith’s IMDb page & while I think Spencer Tracy was a brilliant actor it’s not clear he understood how a TV series worked — or was just way ahead of his time.
So @MeredthSalenger got all Natty Gann’d tonight and I didn’t think she could take my breath away more than she already does but here we are.
This brilliant/stupid thread between @jimatdel and @DPasquesi is reason 3,007 to watch the amazing @Lodge49.
Sshop ssmart, sshop:
Your mom agrees with you.
I am working with @AllenRueckert, who is @JamesUrbaniak’s PERFECT DOPPLEGANGER.
Trump: Well, you’re fired. Anything you need before you’re escorted out of the White House?
Loyal aide: 30 seconds of room tone.
Got to spend yesterday wandering downtown L.A. with the always-fun @MeredthSalenger. Highly recommended — the city and the person. https://t.co/rXt4GtLDbZ
I got you sweetie. Baking soda and Advil (and vanilla Oreos) are close at hand!
Total(1) => 0.07739520072937 f_f_QM(2) => 0.070788860321045 indS(2) => 0.037395238876343 indM(2) => 0.031806945800781 indM_1(2) => 0.0034401416778564 indM_2(2) => 0.00089693069458008 indM_4(2) => 0.0064561367034912 indM_5(2) => 0.0097129344940186 indM_6(2) => 0.0054359436035156 indM_7(2) => 0.0033159255981445 indM_8(2) => 0.0020716190338135 f_f_pTL(2) => 0.0051240921020508 f_f_dT(20) => 0.0048806667327881