Summer Breeze Karmel

Summer Breeze Karmel

it’s all nice on ice alright

57996 followers  •  3130 follow  •    •  

@kerryeggers  You're a legend, Kerry! Thank you for helping to foster my appreciation of sports and the countless hours of information and entertainment.

Standing on the porch with a mug of coffee. I squint into the rising sun. Is now too early to get stoned? Maybe. Maybe. However...

For $500 I’ll dress like Wario and do whatever you want. $300 if it’s sexual.

I passed on the Will Smith Quibi thing because I believe Bel-Air should be governed by the people and for the people.

History will remember this as our Mario phase, not as the COVID-19 epidemic.

Social distancing? Nah brotha, SoCal distancing. 😎 *paddleboards off a cliff*

I love how every now and there’s a viral tweet that’s like... WOULD YOU EAT THIS FOR $10,000,000???

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Can you be a city bumpkin or is that just a country thing?


Since we're all just stuck inside, why not share your favorite fact about anything ever. I'll start. Once, when Larry Bird was recovering from a back injury, he ate seven wedding cakes. He specifically ate wedding cakes because "Who would fuck up a wedding cake?"

Watching the Warriors beat LeBron is like watching the steam engine beat John Henry.

The Warriors win close games the way a kid with rich parents ends up getting a great job even though he just drinks and does coke all the way through college.

I don't pray, but I'm doing whatever it is I do for John Prine.

They should send Floyd Mayweather to the ring and tell George Zimmerman it's DMX. He won't know the difference.

22 year old me after a night of drinking: "I hope I didn't do anything stupid." 29 year old me: "I hope I didn't agree to go on a hike."

You can't put "mayo" in the name of a holiday and expect white people to not appropriate it.

Pete Buttigieg is the mayor of a college town and he’s running for President. The hell is he gonna do if he wins, jump start the economy by opening two Pita Pits and an open mic night?