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Queen of everywhere you'd want to visit. One's new book 'Still Reigning' is out now: http://amzn.to/1A08A2P (FICTIONAL/SATIRE)

Latest Scoops

Ok, drink up and piss off. One’s got shit to do. #Trump
Tell him one’s not in. #trump
President Trump arrives this evening. We’re not having him staying at the palace for reasons of a ‘fake tan on one’s linen’ nature. #Orangina
If Croatia is annexed as a colony of the Isle of Wight, dors that mean we’re technically in the final? Asking for a friend. #StandByRoyalNavy
Look on the bright side, England. We still have Theresa May.
Making Boris Johnson ambassador to Croatia. #EnglandvCroatia
Not sure it’s coming home.
Watching from the bottom of a pool of gin. #ENGCRO
Total(1) => 0.037698030471802 f_f_QM(2) => 0.031049013137817 indS(2) => 0.018237113952637 indM(2) => 0.010139226913452 indM_1(2) => 0.0029511451721191 indM_2(2) => 0.00072503089904785 indM_4(2) => 0.001723051071167 indM_5(2) => 0.0012860298156738 indM_6(2) => 0.00095367431640625 indM_7(2) => 0.0012190341949463 indM_8(2) => 0.0008549690246582 f_f_pTL(2) => 0.0038740634918213 f_f_dT(20) => 0.0036044120788574