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1,453,240 followers   •   2,277 following   •   Indianapolis   •   http://ShirtsForAmerica.c
Guiness Book Record Holder attempting 2 make folks laugh. 1st comedy special Pat McAfee: UNCAGED is on iTunes. My mom said it doesn't suck. Snap~FourthDownBoss

Latest Scoops

Put it in the spank bank cuzzie @TaylorLewan77.. from @joethomas73 on today’s pod
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On today’s podcast, ‘tis a heater I couldn’t take it anymore... Enough of the bullshits Tim Cook. I need the cot damn percentage back.
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🗣 @BroBroBroBets
Carolina +6
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I’ll never forget meeting Luke Kuechly in the hotel at the Pro Bowl.. Glasses on, polo, soft spoken, very nice..

Would never guess that the same human goes on a football field, flips a switch.. becomes a full cot damn lunatic.
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T’s and P’s to @thomasmorstead.. Helmet to knee while mid punt is a legit shit your pants situation. Hope he’s alright
Hey @LincolnMotorCo... My name’s Pat. Very nice to meet you. Who’s back needs to be happy ended to get on the list for one of the 80 Suicide Continentals?
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Total(1) => 0.1095449924469 f_f_QM(2) => 0.10107707977295 indS(2) => 0.062916994094849 indM(2) => 0.035413026809692 indM_1(2) => 0.0098488330841064 indM_2(2) => 0.0011799335479736 indM_4(2) => 0.0073490142822266 indM_5(2) => 0.0069072246551514 indM_6(2) => 0.0015580654144287 indM_7(2) => 0.0052061080932617 indM_8(2) => 0.0027458667755127 f_f_pTL(2) => 0.0053451061248779 f_f_dT(20) => 0.0050604343414307